Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Drugs

I took the drug
It’s my own fault
I was only going to do it once
But everyone knows
Once you do it the devil has you
You can’t break free
I swore I wasn’t going to use needles
But I did
Now I have built up a tolerance
I have to use more and more
Putting myself more at risk of dying

I feel bugs under my skin
I can’t see them
But I know they are there
They crawl up and down my body
I grab a sharp, thin bladed knife
I pick at my own skin
My teeth are rotted and gone
My gums are black and bleeding
I can’t stop myself form taking this drug
I need it to survive

I would do anything for this drug
I slept with a man
Now I have an STD
I have HIV
I swore I’d never sleep with someone for drugs again
But in the end
The drugs take a hold of you and never let’s go
I did sleep with another man
Little did he know
I gave him HIV
I always thought I’d never steal
Until I did
I took money from family members
And friends
I stole from everyone possible
I bought more and more drugs from my dealer

Until one day I was locked up in jail
I look back and saw what the drug did to me
It ruined my life
I became violent
I was ugly
I did what ever the drug told me to
The drug became my life
Nothing else mattered
I didn’t care if I hurt someone
I just wanted to feel good again
That drug made me feel good again

Once I was out of jail
I found my dealer
I bought some more drugs
In the morning I was found
Leaning against a silver trash can
In a dark, dirty ally
With packets that once contained the drug
Around me
I died of an overdose
The drug took over my life and ruined it
I will never know what I could have been

Only what should of been

Monday, May 21, 2007

Elijah

A young girl named Elijah
Was taken from her family when she was young
To a place she has never seen
Let alone heard of
In this barren desert like place
She is different
She has short, curly, blond hair,
Crystal blue eyes
And a pale, small body with gentle, fragile features
Everyone else in this place
Has long, straight brown hair,
Dark brown eyes, and are big boned
She wasn’t as smart as everyone else
Or as fast as everyone else
She didn’t belong

After Elijah arrived she found a cardboard box
And called it her home
To most it was just an old, beaten cardboard box
But to Elijah it was home
Her home

Elijah was molested, beaten, and teased
After she came to this new place
She hated herself for being different
She had a low self esteem
She then learned she was different for a reason
She knew she would have to be self sufficient
She had to learn everything
From watching others and experimenting on her own

Once Elijah was old enough to go to school
She went and underwent more teasing and beatings
But she always came back the next day
She wanted to prove to everyone she could succeed
Even if she was different
Elijah became more confident
She pushed even harder

One day when Elijah was walking home from school
Some gangsters were driving around
All the gangsters had brown hair and brown eyes
And were big boned
They had guns and grenades
They drove towards Elijah
Elijah didn’t see or hear them coming
The gangsters took out a gun and shot
They shot her in the arm
She fell and clutched her arm
Her arm was broken, bleeding, and useless
She tried and painfully got up
She grabbed her notebooks with her other arm
And tried stumbled on
She wanted to prove to them she wasn't scared
The gangsters took another shot
This time hitting her in the leg
Elijah cried out in agony
The gangsters laughed an evil laugh
They watched and laughed as Elijah wince and cried in pain
She laid her head on the cold, blood stained concrete
Her leg and arm had dark red blood gushing out
She tried to stand up one more time
She made it
As soon as she stood up
The gangster with the gun put the scope up to his eye and aimed
The shot her went into the back of her head
They turned and fled laughing as they left
Elijah’s cold, blood covered, dead body was left there

No one paid attention to her

Elijah never got a proper burial
She was thrown in the trash along with the garbage
Elijah never got to experience the joys of life
Because Elijah was different

Who I Am

Pencils can’t write what I feel
Talking can’t say what I mean
Art can’t show what I want
What can show me for who I am?
I am a blank canvas waiting to be painted
I am story waiting to be written
I am something coming from nothing
I am me
And there is no person just like me
No copies made in a cubicle at work
No rough drafts in someone’s computer
I am who I am
No one else is

My Favorite Place

Where the water meets the dock
That’s my favorite place
Where the road meets the grass
That’s my favorite place
Where the trees are tall
And covered with variety of bugs
Surrounding a big purple house
That overlooks the water in front of the mountains
That’s my favorite place
In front of the house is a
Blue specked hot tub
Where we looked at the stars
On nights when the sky was clear
That’s my favorite place
Where there are an abundance of flowers
Lilacs, Daffodils, Tulips, and Peonies
They all smell wonderfully different
That’s my favorite place
Where there are small stairs
You can hardly walk up
Covered with a nasty, dark, green carpet
That’s my favorite place
With a fire pit in the back
Where we conversed and gazed
On beautiful, cool nights
That’s my favorite place
I feel loved
I feel happy
I feel at home at this place
My favorite place

Sunday, May 20, 2007

Feeding the Enemy

My enemy
Hate cutting life
Like a knife through butter
Not even caring what it leaves behind
Sadness, pain, and newly formed hate
Killing even more
My enemy
The sound of hate
Brings fire to my eyes
My enemy
Everyone has jealousy
Jealousy turns into hate
Once someone hates
It spreads faster then bacteria
To everyone
My enemy
Cares for nothing
Except causing pain
I hate my enemy
Therefore I am feeding my enemy
Causing it to grow
Causing pain to others
Causing sadness to form
I just wanted to love
But I hated and ruined everything
I am my enemy

Dreams

Are dreams a way to escape the real world?
Or are they what we just wish to happen?
Do dreams have a purpose?
Do we need dreams?
If we didn’t have dreams
We wouldn’t be able to work out the problems we have in our lives
We would go crazy
We would be short tempered
We would be violent
That’s why dreams were made
To tame the savage beasts in us
It is also an escape from all the pain of the real world
Dreams are my escape to a perfect existence
With no pain
No suffering
No hate
No lies
Nothing evil
Only good
Evil is another story
Evil comes in the form of nightmares
Good comes in the form of dreams

When We Die

When we die
Who will remember us?
Who will still love us?
Who will know we are still here in spirit?
We are just one person
In the great chain of life
And when we leave
A burden leaves someone’s shoulders
A weight they had to carry
When we die
Will we live happy in another world?
Will we live in heaven?
Will we die and be born again?
What will happen when we die?
No one knows except for the dead
But they can’t tell us
Its their secret

Falling Off The Edge

We are born small and naked
We depend on someone
We live, learn, grow, and become strong
We start slipping
We learn of the past
To make the future better
We have fewer dependants
We want to break free
We are slipping towards the edge
We leave the house and live on our own
We forget the things we really need to know
We come closer to the edge
We loose our memories of the past
We create memories of the present
As we forget more of our past lives
We become new people
Then when we forget our family
And the ones we love
We fall off the cliff
Into the broken memories that were lost
And will always be lost within ourselves
Never to be seen again

Saturday, May 19, 2007

Solitary Shell

We live
We die
We feel pain
It is just part of life
We get to know someone
And then they leave
You are filled with pain and sorrow
You go in to your solitary shell
Then you are different
You have to become self sufficient
You don’t get close to anyone
For fear of your heart being ripped apart again
For fear of loving and then having to let go
Fear of leaving your solitary shell
And everything falling to pieces
In the real world
The world filled with pain
Not your world, your solitary shell

Unnoticed

A child alone
Living in the shadows of the dark
He lives unnoticed
He sits and waits for the day
To pass away unnoticed
Like one star in the universe
If he goes no one will know
Because there are a billion more
To cover up the space of his absence
He left unnoticed
By everyone

~I feel this is my best poem!~

Sun

The sun, a heart
Pumping all things with heat
Bringing me to life
Causing me to die
Bringing others to life
Causing them to die
Like planets in the universe
Planets revolving around the sun
If the sun dies
So do we
So does everything
And we end up with nothing
We start all over

I Am

I am smart and responsible
I wonder what the world will be like in the future
I hear the beating of my heart when I am scared

I see the stars so bright in the middle of the day
I want my dog to live forever
I am smart and responsible
I pretend I am a teacher
I feel the weight of the stars on my shoulder
I touch the sun which is like a heart
I worry about the soldiers in wars
I cry when my mom is on the other side of the world
I am smart and responsible
I understand how hard it is to make new friends
I say i care about Earth
I dream about life
I try to do my best at everything
I hope the future is bright
I am smart and responsible

Airplanes

As I fly across the land
People stare and wave their hand
As they watch me fly on by
Can they see me waving hi?

Trust

I am up, down, and all around
I am what people count on when they are down
To hold them and keep them safe and sound

I can also cause frowns to turn upside down
When happy, mad, or sad
At times i can be vary bad

I can also help a lad
Get trough to his dad
To help make new friends
And wounds i will mend
I bring happiness when you hear my sound
I am up, down, and all around

I am trust

Stuffed With Hay

Every morning i get restuffed with hay and set up again
After my stuffing, I have to stand really tall
And yet I feel small
But who would take my word For I am a play toy for the birds
Who try to get by to get the corn I guard
Then they cheep, squawk, and fly at me
Until I scream, they all go flying North, South, East, West
Which ever way is the best
But I don't care because the sun comes down soon I can have some rest
So I will be ready for the next days challange

I am a scarecrow

Lemons and Limes

Lacy loves lemony, leomade
That she can only get in London
Larry likes long, loopy, licorice
That's from Liverpool

Lou likes lousy, limbuger
Thats from lower Luxemburg

Lou, Larry, and Lacy loath limes From Lima


Are We Willing

Are we willing to be nice?
Are we willing to forgive others?
Are we willing to make new friends?
Are we willing to have fun around others?
Are we willing to give to others and expect nothing back?
Are we willing to give it our all?
Are we willing to fix problems, instead of ingoring them?
Are we willing to accept the truth?
Are we willing to accept the pase?
Are we willing to change the future?
Are we willing to accept ourselves for who we are?
Are we willing to do what is needed to be done?

If we were willing to do anyting
the world would be different