Drugs

I took the drug
It’s my own fault
I was only going to do it once
But everyone knows
Once you do it the devil has you
You can’t break free
I swore I wasn’t going to use needles
But I did
Now I have built up a tolerance
I have to use more and more
Putting myself more at risk of dying

I feel bugs under my skin
I can’t see them
But I know they are there
They crawl up and down my body
I grab a sharp, thin bladed knife
I pick at my own skin
My teeth are rotted and gone
My gums are black and bleeding
I can’t stop myself form taking this drug
I need it to survive

I would do anything for this drug
I slept with a man
Now I have an STD
I have HIV
I swore I’d never sleep with someone for drugs again
But in the end
The drugs take a hold of you and never let’s go
I did sleep with another man
Little did he know
I gave him HIV
I always thought I’d never steal
Until I did
I took money from family members
And friends
I stole from everyone possible
I bought more and more drugs from my dealer

Until one day I was locked up in jail
I look back and saw what the drug did to me
It ruined my life
I became violent
I was ugly
I did what ever the drug told me to
The drug became my life
Nothing else mattered
I didn’t care if I hurt someone
I just wanted to feel good again
That drug made me feel good again

Once I was out of jail
I found my dealer
I bought some more drugs
In the morning I was found
Leaning against a silver trash can
In a dark, dirty ally
With packets that once contained the drug
Around me
I died of an overdose
The drug took over my life and ruined it
I will never know what I could have been
Only what should of been